Canyons - Run for LIFE 2013 Devotion #2

Less than three weeks until the Pinhoti 100.  The past two weeks I have been dealing with some leg pain that has made training difficult.  In fact, I have missed several days of training in an attempt to rest and recover.  The pain started after I had the unique opportunity to run a double-crossing of the Grand Canyon, called the Rim-to-Rim-to-Rim (R2R2R) in late September.  The experience was amazing, but while I was able to finish the journey it is clear I did not walk away without harm.

The R2R2R begins on the South Rim (elevation 7,000+ feet) of the Grand Canyon.  Andon Briggs and I began by descending 4,400 feet on the South Kaibab Trail 7 miles to the Colorado River at the base of the Grand Canyon.  We crossed a bridge over the river and even met a mule train leading travelers out of the canyon floor. 

 

 

From there, the North Kaibab Trail snaked through and up the canyon floor for roughly 8 miles before climbing over 5,400 in 6 miles up and out of the canyon floor to the North Rim (elevation 8,000+).  We then turned around and went back the other way back to the South Rim via the Bright Angel Trail.  The total distance was 46 miles with a ton of climbing and descent.  A perfect training run for the upcoming Pinhoti 100.

The run itself was an amazing, tough and beautiful experience.  Our pace was slow due slightly to the tough terrain, but mainly because we were in awe of our surroundings.  Picture opportunities were everywhere, so we indulged. 

I had briefly visited the South Rim of the Grand Canyon when I was a teenager, but viewing the Canyon from various vantage points was breathtaking.  From sunrise in the canyon to after sundown when the full moon was reflecting off the canyon walls, each vista and part of the day provided evidence of the creativity of our creator. 

The high temperature at the south rim was 74 degrees…perfect weather.  The high at the north rim was even a bit cooler.  At the start the temperature was around 50 degrees.  However, the high on the canyon floor was in the upper 90’s, and the heat index was well over 100.  With very little cloud cover, the canyon floor felt like an oven.

Running downhill was easy, but, not surprisingly, the toughest parts of the run were the climb to the North Rim at the halfway point of the run and the climb to the South Rim to end the journey.  The climbs began in the heat of the sun exposed canyon floor and proceeded relentlessly up several thousand feet in a short time span.  These climbs were also quite exposed, with one edge of the trail hugging a canyon wall and the other edge falling hundreds/thousands of feet straight down.  The picture below shows an example of this…the trail is there if you look closely.

Reaching the top in both cases brought a sense of relief and accomplishment.  To physically look back from the top of the rim at the canyon below and think about how far we had come was encouraging and rewarding.  It made the cool temperatures and rest all the more enjoyable.

To me this mirrors struggles in my own Christian walk with temptation and sin.  Giving in to temptation and repeatedly sinning is easy, similar to the descents in the canyon.  In the canyon it was easy to ignore the danger of exposed cliffs and rising heat because running downhill was effortless, just as in our spiritual lives it is easy to ignore sin and separation from God because the sin feels good in the moment.  However, before long, we realize the damage that has been done, not just to ourselves but to those around us.  We are far removed from God and have only our own actions and decisions to blame.  In a short period of time we find ourselves thousands of feet into a canyon, with the heat on full blast, dehydrated, looking up at the canyon walls wondering how will I ever get back up and out of this.

The good news is that God provides us a way out of temptation so that we can avoid the descent to the canyon floor entirely.  Sure, with God’s help we can climb back up, but the climb back up is much tougher than the way down.  Plus, just as I am dealing with aches and pains after the run, we are left with scars from our own descents into the canyon of sin.  Many times we leave scars on the ones we love most.  God’s desire is for us to stay on top, finding comfort, fulfillment and satisfaction in our relationship with Him.  When we are tempted, and we all will be tempted, we can find strength in Him to resist and turn from the temptation to avoid sin.   You can resist.  You can fight.

LIFE Ministries works directly with couples who are in the depths of their own canyon.  The ministry is committed to helping hurting couples who are facing crisis or potential divorce. LIFE Ministries also walks with couples who need a "tune-up" and want to take their relationship with God and one another to a deeper level…to avoid the canyons entirely.  Please be in prayer for the ministry and I ask that you consider supporting LIFE Ministries financially through the Run for LIFE effort.  Your contributions allow the ministry to continue to work with couples to climb out of the canyons and later look back from the top to see how far they have come and the beauty of what lies ahead.  To contribute or for more information please visit www.runforlifenow.com

1 Corinthians 10:13 – No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.  And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 

Wide Awake - Run for LIFE 2013 Devotion #1

Less than four weeks from the start of the Pinhoti 100!  Training has gone quite well, and other than a few minor aches and pains I'm feeling good.  Some of you have asked about the Grand Canyon Rim-to-Rim-to-Rim run last month.  Hopefully I'll get some pictures on here soon enough.

Last year I ran the Pinhoti 100 to raise funds for LIFE Ministries, a local ministry here in Birmingham that is committed to helping individuals and couples in their walks with Christ.  I am doing the same this year, along with a team of others running various races this fall.  Run for LIFE Team Members are: Will Harris, Lisa Brush, David and Miles Brush, Blair Canale, Randy & Melody Hemphill, Michael & Mandy Jeffcoat, Robert & Sasha Johns, Dana Pate, and Andrew Varvoutis. See their bios or donate at www.runforlifenow.com.

Similar to last year, each week leading up to the race, I am writing a devotion that brings spiritual application from the world of running and life. This week's devotion is below.

Please consider sponsoring me or any of the other team members by visiting www.runforlifenow.com.

Thank you for supporting an amazing ministry!

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October 8, 2013 – Wide Awake by Chris Dollar

“Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead.  Then Christ will shine on you.” Ephesians 5:14

Having a full-time job, a wife and kids, most of my training runs begin early in the morning.  I’ve found this to be the best way for me to get in my training while having the least impact on my family.  While I have grown somewhat accustomed to the middle of the night/early morning pre-dawn runs, I’m not sure I can ever get fully used to it, and most days it remains extremely tough to roll out of bed when that alarm clock rings. 

My routine at that point is simple enough.  Begin stretching in complete darkness, hoping this will somehow awaken my body to the point where it is ready to make it a few steps downstairs to continue stretching with the lights on.  I also have a small bite to eat before beginning the miles for that day, usually 30 minutes or so after the alarm clock rings. 

Despite the 30 minutes, stretching, food, water and movement, my first few miles are usually the worst of my run.  It takes me a while to get going.  As the training load increases for a big race like the Pinhoti 100, the time it takes me to warm-up and feel functional in the morning gets longer and longer.  There are many times when it feels like I’m sleep-running, just drifting along in the dark, knowing that I’m awake, but still part of me wondering if it is a dream. 

I never know when it will finally click on a particular day, but it inevitably does.  Could be after just 15 minutes and sometimes it has been two hours, but at some point my body and mind click into gear, I feel like myself, and the miles suddenly seem easy.  I can’t explain why the transformation happens when it does, but it is always a great feeling.

I hate to admit it, but many times my life feels like the beginning of these runs.  Like I’m in some strange sleepwalking (or running) state.  I know things are happening all around me, but I have this sense that all is not as it should be.  I just don’t feel like myself.  John Ortberg describes it as a “state of dis-appointment”, meaning that we remove God from the central, appointed role He desires to play in our life and have instead replaced him with ourselves.  I know I am guilty of this.  I replace God with me…my flawed worldly desires, aspirations, idols and plans.  The funny part is that God knows me better than I know myself, so truly turning my life and desires over to Him would allow me to truly experience life to the fullest through God.  After all, if God had a plan for me from the beginning, would it not make sense to allow Him to work that plan in me?

I know this to be true, so why is it so hard to “Take the Leap” and fully trust in God?  Being alive in Christ and leading a life full of desire, hope and joy sounds far better than anything I have tried to create for myself.  I need this full transformation, but instead of taking the leap I keep my feet firmly planted on the less desirable life I’ve created for myself.  I want to feel like the miles when I’m wide awake and all is clicking that is possible through Christ, rather than the dreary state that I have created for myself.  In Christ I find freedom and power and joy.  True spiritual growth produces this transformation, and the good news is that it is possible for us all to experience it through the power of God. 

 

"Now, with God’s help, I shall become myself.”  -Soren Kierkegaard

Massanutten 100 Race Report/Devotional

Below is my Massanutten 100 race report/devotional written for LIFE Ministries, a local ministry here in Birmingham.  To find out more about them please visit http://www.lifeministriesnow.com/

Running Solo?

Well, it sure wasn’t pretty, but I finished.  The Massanutten Mountain Trails 100 Mile Run was every bit as difficult as advertised.  For me, it was a tale of two halves.  The first half was fantastic, the second was awful.  I reached the Indian Grave Trailhead Aid Station at Mile 50.1 in 10:23, feeling strong, in control and in the top 20 overall, ready to tackle the 2^nd half.  The second half took me 19:10.  Ugh. 

So what happened?  Not quite sure.  My hydration, calorie intake, legs and physical state were strong.  However, my mental state deteriorated rapidly.  Could’ve been the lack of course preparation before the race, oncoming sickness that took hold after completing the race, racing in the solo division with no outside support, or just general apathy, but just after the mile 54 aid station I mentally checked out of the race.  I no longer wanted to be there.  I no longer cared about finishing.  In fact, I spent miles 56-60 thinking about how I would write a devotion for LIFE Ministries about quitting!  Decision made.

The decision to drop is not an easy one.  I have never dropped from a race of any distance, despite having some miserable experiences.  This was different.  I was convinced that my day was done and I had every intention of dropping at Camp Roosevelt (Mile 63.9). 

Around mile 60, John Dove passed me.  John is an amazing ultrarunner with over thirty 100 mile finishes under his belt, including a win at Pinhoti a couple years ago.  He could tell I was struggling and offered me some encouragement.  Our conversation was brief, given that I was stumbling through the woods and had just thrown up, and he was moving along quite well, but here is a snapshot of how I remember it.  My unspoken thoughts are in parenthesis after my actual verbal response in quotes.

                John:   “No, no, no.  Get going.  Can’t stop now.”
                Me:   Grunt, grunt, “Feeling awful”, grunt, grunt. (How is he moving so fast?)
                John:   “This will pass.  Keep moving and you’ll rebound.”
                Me:   Grunt, grunt “Yeah.  Aid station.  Good.  Slow.  Sit.  You?” (I’ll rebound back in the hotel room after I get a ride off this mountain.)
                John:   “You need anything?  Salt, gels, food?”
                Me:   Grunt, grunt. “Aid Station.  Good.  Slow.  Sit.  Good.”  Grunt. (What I need is a ride back to town after I drop at this next aid station.  Wonder if I can still make a late showing of Iron Man 3.)
                John:   “Just think of all the time and energy you put into training for this and the sacrifices made.  You don’t have to move fast, just keep going.”
                Me:   “Yeah, thanks.”  (Dangit John!  Why’d you have to say something like that?  Now I may have to actually stay out here and slog through another 40+ miles.)

So, with that encouragement I continued on after a long stop at the Camp Roosevelt Aid Station.  Around mile 72 I decided to drop again.  I sat down on a rock and stared into the darkness.  I started calculating…the next aid station is Visitor Center at mile 78…25 miles to go at that point…at my current pace that’s over 10 hours remaining to finish…absolutely not.  25 miles wasn’t scary, but 10 hours was.  I’m out.  At that point a runner approached, who saw me sitting and asked me to come with him.  He said his pace was slow, but a lot faster than my current sitting pace.  I agreed and hitched on with Nelson Hernandez from North Carolina, but originally from El Salvador (I think...brain wasn’t fully functioning), and he kept a strong hiking/jogging pace that kept me moving.  He also talked to me constantly, asking me a lot of questions.  My responses, as well as the concentration it took for me to decipher his accent in the middle of the night, made me momentarily forget my misery and helped me focus my mind on something else.    

I remember none of our conversation, but I do know that Nelson’s presence enabled me to get to the Visitor Center Aid Station at mile 78.  Just before the aid station I developed a plan.  I would stop at mile 78, abandon the solo division, take a nap in the crew vehicle of my friend Andon Briggs who was also running the race, wake up when he arrived, then run the rest of the race with him.  Or, if he dropped I would simply do the same and catch a ride back to the hotel with his family.  This way I either have company for the final 10 hours or I quit and get some sleep.  Good plan.  I arrived and Andon’s family was nowhere to be seen.  I found someone with a cell phone signal who checked and confirmed that Andon had dropped at mile 64 due to sickness.  He came down with strep throat two days before the race, so getting to mile 64 was pretty amazing.  So, no cozy crew nap vehicle.  No company.  I was disappointed for him, as he had never dropped from a race, but was mainly jealous.  So much for my brilliant plan.  He better not be at Iron Man 3. 

I then sat, dejected, and began a 10 hour display of impressive emotional eating.  I was sad and depressed, so I ate like a teenager after a breakup.  Typically I eat gels and easily digestible food in these races, but no longer.  I immediately consumed an entire cheeseburger and three quesadillas.  After eating I was faced with a decision.  Drop now and figure out a way back to my rental car at the start line, or finish the final 25 miles, regardless of pace.  No looking back.  If I left the aid station I would finish even if it meant crawling.  I chose this route, but it was no easy decision.  I left the aid station, half-joking with a nice volunteer that “I’m going back out there, but I’m not happy about it.” 

Shortly after leaving the aid station I met up with two runners, Bill and his pacer Judy.  I asked if I could tag along with them and they graciously agreed.  I stayed with Bill and Judy for hours, through sunrise, and all the way to around mile 94.  Bill and Judy were ridiculously positive and upbeat.  It was amazing.  Their pace never changed, and they continued to chat regardless of the terrain.  Uphill…chatting, downhill…chatting, boulder fields…chatting.  Their positive energy was exactly what I needed.  We talked about family, races, politics, and anything else that came up. 

When we parted ways at mile 94 I realized that I only had ten miles remaining.  This was a huge mental lift.  I still felt bad, and my pace remained slow, but the end was in sight.  After a couple more aid stations and more eating (grilled cheese sandwich, five more quesadillas, pancakes, bacon, sausage, etc.), the finish line was in sight.  I crossed the line in 29:33, about 4 hours slower than I expected.  Despite the slow finish, I was satisfied with the race.  It was fulfilling to complete a race when I didn’t want to.  To truly persevere.

I received an extra award for finishing “Solo”, however I don’t feel like this was warranted.  Sure, I set out to do the race by myself, but in three different occasions detailed above, other runners came to my aid at exactly the time I most needed help.  At these moments I was not mentally equipped to proceed alone, but John, Nelson, Bill and Judy, through their encouragement and company helped me go on. 

Our Christian faith is much the same.  Our relationship with Christ is personal, but not private.  Our faith is strengthened by walking with other believers and encouraging each other along our way.  Sometimes only a little encouragement and support is needed, while other times more care and attention is required. 

 Our community of believers should function similar to the runners in this race.  The runners mentioned above helped me tremendously when I needed it most.  Further, early in the race when I felt good, I helped another runner who was struggling get through a rough patch through support and providing him with supplies from my pack.  We should be there for our fellow Christians and allow others to be there for us.  This is Christ’s design for the church.  John 17:21-23 includes part of Christ’s prayer for all believers, praying that all of us may be one so that the world may believe in Him.  Jesus wants us to be united together, involved in the good and bad of each other’s lives.  This is so different than what we’re accustomed to in our self-centered and individualistic society.  We want to live like the cowboy in the western movie, walking into town tough and alone.  Christ calls us to just the opposite.  We need each other.  Solo isn’t the design for Christians.

Encourage others, be involved, care about people’s struggles and their successes…and be prepared for them to do the same for you.

My prayer is not for them alone.  I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you.  May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.  I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: I in them and you in me.  May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.

- John 17:20-23

Pre Massanutten 100 Update: On Idols, Priorities and Finding Approval

Below is an update/devotional written for LIFE Ministries, a local ministry here in Birmingham.  To find out more about them please visit http://www.lifeministriesnow.com/


On April 22^nd I received an email from the Race Director of the Massanutten 100 informing me that I was off the wait list and in the race.  In December I did not gain entry to the race through the lottery, but entered the wait list not knowing whether or not I would get it.  Four months later, and less than 4 weeks before the start of the race I was in.

The Massanutten 100 is a 103.7 mile trail race in the Shenandoah Mountains of Virginia.  The course is known for its rocks and difficulty.  Finish times are generally 3-6 hours slower than those at the Pinhoti 100 that I finished in November in 23+ hours.  So, the race promises to be a challenge!  To make matters worse, I have decided to enter the Solo Division (formerly known as the Stonewall Jackson Foot Cavalry Division…sweet name) which means I can have no crew or pacers during the entirety of the race.  This was an easy decision, as the late entry and race location in Virginia made it difficult to arrange for support. 

Despite the difficulties that I know await me during the race, I am completely at peace headed into the event.  This year has had a different feel for me personally and with running.  My training has been less, but my results in races have been better.  More significantly, my enjoyment of running in general has been higher than in the past.  Why?

A little more than two years ago I had some moderate success in my earliest ultramarathon races.  This relative success made me push more and more, and running quickly became an overwhelming focus in my life.  My feelings can best be summed up by a couple of quotes from Harold Abrahams in the movie Chariots of Fire.  First, he responds to a question about his love of running, to which he answers, “I’m more of an addict. It's a compulsion with me, a weapon I can use.”  Later, before running the 100 meter race in the Olympics, Abrahams states, “I’m forever in pursuit, and I don’t even know what it is I’m chasing…I’ll raise my eyes and look down that corridor, four feet wide, with ten lonely seconds to justify my whole existence…but will I?”  While, admittedly, my emotions were not as strong as an Olympic runner, I nonetheless was dangerously close to establishing an identity for myself that was dependent on my performance in races.

Further, I justified this with God.  My thought process was simple, “God, if you help me do well and be successful, then I can REALLY serve you.”  How often do we do this as Christians?  And with seemingly good things?  Conversations with God can start to sound like negotiations…God, if you will get me into a bigger house then I can REALLY entertain for you…God, if you put us in the right school district for our kids then we can REALLY have an impact for you with other parents…God, if you can help me get that promotion then I can REALLY serve and give more to missions.  We tend to mistakenly believe that God needs our stuff in order to be used for the Kingdom, when REALLY, God can use us just as we are if only we love Christ and love others and are willing to serve.

I remember thinking that running was essential to my being, and my thoughts gravitated to running even when I was sitting still.  I read every running blog, magazine article and book that was available.  I listened to running podcasts and pored through race reports.  I thought I would continue to improve as a runner by immersing myself fully into the running culture and thus increase my success.  Then I fractured my heel. 

Suddenly I could not run at all.  I was completely devastated.  My attitude at home was tense.  I sulked and was certainly not a pleasure to be around.  For six weeks I could not run, and instead walked around with an orthopedic boot.  In the preceding months I had built an identity around running and constant activity, and now I couldn’t even walk to the kitchen without strapping on a monstrous velcro contraption to my foot. 

Looking back months later this injury was a blessing in disguise.  Running had become an idol for me.  Underneath it was a search and longing for approval and status that I believed running and running well would certainly bring.  The approval that I have from my relationship with Jesus Christ had been quickly replaced by the search for hollow approval through sport and fitness.  When this happened, it impacted more than my walk with God and my running.  Everything on my life’s priority list was out of balance.

I am thankful that God revealed this idol to me.  Over the past two years He has shown me the way to reestablish the proper order in my life.  A funny thing happened when this occurred.  I started enjoying running more and even began to perform better in races.  I learned a valuable lesson through this process…God wants us to enjoy life and all the blessings that come from it (family, friends, food, hobbies, etc.), but they are only fully enjoyed when our relationship with Christ is our aim, and therefore we may have life to the fullest.

So, all said, I will be at the race this weekend and will give it my all.  I will be pushing hard to do my best, but in the end, whether good or bad, I am not defined by the race or my performance in it.  My approval is found in Christ alone. 

RACE LINK

If you want to track my misery, the following link is supposed to provide updates throughout the race.

http://www.vhtrc.org/mmtlive/

IDOLS RESOURCES

If you want to know more about our modern day idols, the book “Counterfeit Gods” by Timothy Keller is a great resource.  Super practical and full of clear insight.  In addition, Adam Robinson, my pastor at Double Oak Community Church, held a study series on this topic that is available for free on iTunes as a podcast at the link below:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/double-oak-university/id634586481

Check it out.  You will be blessed.

FINALLY

Since I began with quotes from Chariots of Fire, I’ll end with one from the same movie, but from a different character.

“I would like to give you something more permanent, but I can only point the way. I have no formula for winning the race. Everyone runs in her own way, or his own way. And where does the power come from, to see the race to its end? From within. Jesus said, "Behold, the Kingdom of God is within you. If with all your hearts, you truly seek me, you shall ever surely find me." If you commit yourself to the love of Christ, then that is how you run a straight race.”  -Eric Liddell